Alter Egos and Getting Off Social Media

Exiting from startups overall feels like a bit of a teenage identity crisis for my career. I had a few things not work, a few kinda work, and a lot of close shots. I was wrong. A lot. I also learned a lot about myself and who I am and want to do in life.

I think around the end of last year I had a bit of a reframing on life from something that was centered around me, to something that is more centered around service. Before I spent a lot of time trying to make the world a better place, but in reality I was just trying to make the world what my ego wanted it to be. I started putting me first in many ways, and what I wanted to feel good about myself. It was a constant chase of a state that I could never really attain.

I don’t like that version of myself.

I find a lot more peace just being happy around family and friends and satisfaction from the things I build (without making them core to who I am).

Slowly I’ve started dropping those alter egos and false images of myself and just letting myself be who I want to be (a lot of which comes out on this blog). I put others first, because that’s what makes me feel good internally, and I’ve stopped taking on things for other people. I don’t need to be the hero my ego wanted me to be.

I’ve been thinking about where that alter ego came out, and I’ve done a lot of 1:1 talking to people in my life about what I might have done wrong, right, and would have changed. It’s been a healthy reflection process. I think we’re all up to date (at least irl).

There’s a version of that ego that lives on twitter that isn’t who I am today. I’ve slowly moved away from that platform over the past ~12 months and I kind of just want to be done with it - no one is listening there anyways, my tweets don’t get any views anymore even things that might be relevant or useful. If anyone wants to get in touch, here is good (substack) and also email (carl@excel.holdings). I’ve felt myself drawn in mostly by this feeling of false danger of something that I never was getting attacked or missing out on some danger of world events in real time (aka when the Charlie Kirk murder happened)

I think I’m going to delete that version of myself on that platform, at least for the time being because it isn’t who I am now and whoever wants to tag along with the new journey is welcome to.

Here’s to some new beginnings 🥂